Professional Speaker Magazine

October 2000

by Peggy O-Neill, CHT, Ojai, California

With every challenge comes a gift. This has certainly been true in my life. Standing only three feet, eight inches tall has presented me with numerous difficulties, and a myriad of blessings. Never had the blessings been so abundant, however, until I began to sashay down the path of being a professional speaker. In this arena, being unique is definitely a huge plus.

Overcome the Obstacles

As I have traveled the road to success, I have encountered many detours, potholes and dead ends. Hidden inside each obstacle, there has been a benefit. As a kid, I was teased and called nasty names. While these situations were never enjoyable or easy, they helped me develop a sense of detachment from the opinion of others. This was a great boon, as it allowed me more freedom in my daily expression and nurtured a natural sense of leadership. As an adolescent, I was excluded from romance and dating. These times were particularly painful, as I was born a hopeless romantic. The good news is that I eventually learned how to gain a sense of being "precious" from within myself. As a young adult, potential bosses observed my deficit before my talent. The other side of the coin: I embarked on the grand adventure of being an entrepreneur.

By applying myself in each of these difficult situations, I was able to turn a disadvantage into an advantage. In truth, I wasn't always so lucky. Case in point:  my college experience.

Having been an enthusiastic photographer since age 16, 1 was elated a decade later to be accepted to one of the top commercial art schools in America, the Art Center College of Design. I was soon to find out that professional photography was a whole different ballgame than being an amateur. Professional photographers use 4x5 and 8xlO cameras, the old-fashion bellows-kind, with a cloth that goes over your head, which weigh about 30 pounds. They use heavy metal stands, light boxes that are bigger than my entire body and huge props. In this endeavor, perhaps for the first time in my life, I felt truly dis-abled, even more so than my disability itself.

At the end of every semester, I wrestled with the idea of dropping out. But my friends continually encouraged me, and as I had the spirit of determination in my blood-from my mother, I suppose-I stuck it out through all eight semesters. One month before my graduation, the dean called me into his office and told me I wouldn't get hired by ad agencies because of my short stature.

Unfortunately, I didn't do a very good job at warding off his negativity. His words somehow became deeply rooted in my psyche. My determination dwindled, and not long after my graduation, I gave up on pursuing my photography career. I wasn't able to turn this one around.

Seize New Opportunities

However, one thing always leads to another. About a decade later, I was working as a psychotherapist. During a phone conversation with my college buddy, Marci Shimoff, co-author of Chicken Soup for the Woman's Soul, I happened to mention I was giving a weekend workshop to promote my therapy practice. She gasped for air, paused and then blurted out at me, "Peggy, your destiny is to be a professional speaker." Her words and conviction shocked me, but something quiet inside of me knew what she said was true. I accepted her invitation, and accompanied her the following week to the NSA Convention.

At that point in time, I didn't even know speaking was an industry, let alone a way of making a viable income. I was totally overwhelmed by the Convention-the amount of information, the spirit of support and encouragement, the level of professionalism. I loved it all, but felt a little lost every time the same echoing question came my way. "What do you speak about?" fellow attendees kept inquiring. Well, of course I didn't have a clue, since I had never even given a speech at Toastmasters let alone Hewlett-Packard!

Once home, I began turning my vision inward to find the thing I would eventually call "my message." I began by asking myself, "What am I qualified to talk about?" And, more importantly, "What am I uniquely qualified to talk about? What can I say that will have a positive impact on people?" Eventually, I came up with the idea of talking about the gifts that have risen out of my life's challenges, and called my keynote program "Gifts in Disguise."

I liked this topic a lot and found it fun to speak about. But there where a few drawbacks. One of them was that the title was difficult to discern. Almost every time I spoke the title, the person I was speaking to wouldn't understand my words. Once they would get the words, they didn't really understand what they meant.

After a while, I developed a new keynote, "Walking Tall: Overcoming Inner Smallness, No Matter What Size You Are." Now when I mention the title, people invariably respond with acute interest and enthusiasm. Other people's responses let me know that I was on a much better track. This is now the title of both my keynote and upcoming book.

Utilize Your Uniqueness

As my career as a professional speaker continues to unfold, I am astounded at the benefits of having a unique appearance. The biggest benefit, I think, is the more unique you are, the more easily people remember you. Being easy to remember is very important in the world of business. Ask anybody who pays to advertise.

Another advantage is that being unique is like a hook, something that grabs people's attention. Being unique, one always grabs people's attention (only sometimes it's not the kind of attention one wants). But positioning one's self as an expert or leader seems to attract a very good kind of attention. Being a speaker, people are more apt to "look up" to me, than to "look down" on me. I like that!

Having a big impact on both meeting planners and audience members is another great part of being a unique speaker. I've found that people are often taken by me because I don't fit their expectations of little people. To create a big impact, however, doesn't require looking different. The more you are who you really are, the deeper you penetrate into people's awareness and memories. Anyone can create a big impact simply by being authentic.

When we're able to speak about universal truths that relate to our uniqueness, and introduce them with a catchy title, we're well on our way to, as Larry Winget says, "Exploiting our uniqueness in the service of others!"

Develop Your Topics

Here are some of the questions I use to hone in on developing great topics and material. You might also find them useful.

What am I qualified to talk about?

What has worked for me that can benefit others?

What's fun, exciting, interesting and funny to talk about?

What's my message?

Then I progress to a deeper level of inquiry, drawing on both the creative and marketing sides to position my work:

What am I uniquely qualified to talk about?

What can I say more powerfully than others?

What distinctive experiences do I have that others can benefit from?

How can I use my uniqueness to support my message?

How can I use my uniqueness to position myself in the marketplace?

Find the Gift Within

Sometimes people shy away from their uniqueness. Sometimes they want to take the thing that makes them stand out from the crowd and put it under a bushel. They sometimes try to hide it because they have been judged, teased or ridiculed for it. But I say, be proud of who you are! Walk tall! Differences are the glory of this creation! So don't hide your uniqueness. Celebrate it! Take the thing that makes you unique and polish it, make it beautiful, find the glory in its essence! Then shine your light and share your gifts with the world, without shame, without fear.

As a speaker, you can lead the way for many, no matter what your uniqueness is. It doesn't have to be in appearance. It can be the way you think or the way you speak. It can be in your values, philosophy or abilities. We are all different! When you let the light of your uniqueness shine, you'll attract positive attention, people will remember you more easily, you'll have a hook to draw others in and you'll have a handle on creating dynamic topics and material. So, go for it! Find the gift within your uniqueness and celebrate that in every moment!